Disengagement Abroad and at Home

Sunday was Tisha B'av, a fast day remembering the distruction of our holy Temple(twice) in Jerusalem. Under normal circumstances this is never one of my favorite summer days, since inevitably it is the hottest day of the year on the longest fast of the year. I also resent having to mourn for three weeks during a season that is, from a secular stand point, supposed to be relaxing and fun.

Just to make things even worse, is this gut wrenching feeling I have whenever I think about our brave brothers and sisters in Gush Katif and what they must be going through. Reading Aicha this year was hitting too close to home. Are we about to fall again, this time because of our own doing???

So my intent here is not to minimize the pain of our people in Gush Katif, but Sunday was also the "disengagement " of my office consulting room which is transforming into a bedroom for my oldest son. Everything in that room was moved out, resulting in chaos in what's left of my "office" space downstairs. I must give kudos to my dear husband and father-in-law who pulled off this amazing feat on a hot fast day. Nevertheless, after 18 years of working in that room, I have this horrible sinking feeling of loss...uncertainty...pain...resentment...etc.

And I don't live in Gush Katif, and my government isn't throwing me out...but I can only imagine that if I am so upset over losing one room, how they must feel to be losing it all.